Coping mechanism



Our lives, and especially our Saturdays, are occupied by wedding planning and will be through October. Instead of asking me how I’m doing or what’s new in Kansas City, people ask me about wedding planning. We have been consumed by the wedding industrial complex.

We are so fortunate to be planning a very large party to celebrate our relationship and our decision to spend the rest of our lives together, and we are also overwhelmed. The wedding industry isn’t really about marriage. It’s about money. It’s also about image, any event in 2019 serving the higher purpose of creating content to share on social media.

We spent several hours this morning side by side on our laptops, looking at images of wedding bouquets and reserving hotel room blocks. Mid-afternoon, we decided we’d had enough. Ryan picked up an empty cardboard box that was waiting to be taken out with the recycling and held it out it front of his chest.

“Kick it,” he said.

I did, letting out a loud yell as my foot hit the cardboard. It felt amazing.

I held it so he could have a turn, the box starting to collapse in upon itself as he gave it a few swift punches.

We put on our shoes and went to Costco. After a morning spent wrapped in the high-pressure expectation of planning a modern wedding, it felt satisfying to quietly enjoy a hot dog and a couple of chicken bakes in a giant American warehouse.